JACQUELINE YOUNG-WELLS
The thought of walking away sent me into a tailspin.
There has to be another way for this scenario to play itself out. My family and
close acquaintances continue to be livid about the choices I have made,
however, I expect them to respect me and be less loquacious about their
displeasure. It is my life and I will have to live or die with my decisions.
I must admit, I would love to have a second spin at
the wheel. Perhaps I would have recognized the signs and sought counsel before
forging forward. I would have entertained the discussions when my loved ones
and friends attempted to broach the subject of my relationship. Instead, I
closeted myself within the walls of my fairytale and remained silent. Sure,
there were instances when I toyed with the idea that someone would understand.
Yet, I was more convinced that I would be judged and ridiculed.
I accused my family of bigotry, when they approached
me about my marriage. I could not hear their words for the racial slurs I heard
in their voices. My father wanted me to marry one of the deacons in his church,
one that understood my background; someone who could assist in raising children
that respected the boundaries that exist in society. He thought he had
instilled those values in me and I am haunted by the disgust in his eyes, when
I chose my husband; a tall, beautiful and intelligent African American.
